Some Answers for the Healing Journey
First, here's an excerpt from the enclosed article Healing Past Hurts:
Healing past hurts or emotional wounds sometimes involves pain.
God may have to do "heart surgery" to break through a person's
self-imposed protective barrier. Be ready for tears and resistance
to visit a painful memory. Don't force anything. If you know about
a painful memory, it often helps to warn that healing past hurts
is sometimes God's heart surgery and that the person may
experience temporary pain on the way to a permanent healing.
If the person allows Christ to (come in and Heal) close the wound,
the pain will have been worthwhile... When done right, God leads,
not us. He's in charge, not us. Christ alone heals, not us.
I remember someone very special to me had once said, “Why would anyone want to talk about (remember) things that bothered them?” Previously in my own life, there were times I tended to agree. Afterall,
who wants to look at and deal with past events and personal experiences that were unpleasant or hurtful? And besides, whatever happened to the "water under the bridge" philosophy? Only problem is, people are known for throwing an awful lot of garbage into the water. Eventually, if it's not dealt with and cleaned up, the garbage tends to accumulate and the
water really begins to stink. As a result, it's far from the Living Water
that Christ offers us.
who wants to look at and deal with past events and personal experiences that were unpleasant or hurtful? And besides, whatever happened to the "water under the bridge" philosophy? Only problem is, people are known for throwing an awful lot of garbage into the water. Eventually, if it's not dealt with and cleaned up, the garbage tends to accumulate and the
water really begins to stink. As a result, it's far from the Living Water
that Christ offers us.
I recall a scene from the Mel Brooks comedy movie Young Frankenstein (yeah okay, I like movies). The young Dr. Frankenstein (Gene Wilder) just arrived in Transylvania to inherit his grandfather's estate. Upon meeting Igor (pronounced "Eye-Gor", Marty Feldman), the doctor says to him, "You know I'm actually quite a brilliant surgeon. I could probably help you with that hump." Physically crippled and hunched over, and looking a bit perplexed, Igor responds by saying, "What Hump?"
In my own life, I’ve experienced that mindset and maybe, so have you. Overall, life seems to be going pretty well, or at the least, it's tolerable. Sure, we all have some "ups and downs." Still, we try our best to appear relatively happy (especially when someone is looking). We try to keep busy and perhaps are even quite successful in our work. When difficulties do occur in our lives, we somehow manage to “pick ourselves up by our own bootstraps”. . . Until maybe one day, we discover those boots are all worn out, or perhaps, we really didn’t own any boots to begin with. Aaahh, how our imagination and desire for the avoidance of pain can sometimes be so intertwined. Only thing is, the PAIN isn't the problem – it's just the symptom. The real problem is the UNHEALED HURTS
that are causing the pain.
In my own life, I’ve experienced that mindset and maybe, so have you. Overall, life seems to be going pretty well, or at the least, it's tolerable. Sure, we all have some "ups and downs." Still, we try our best to appear relatively happy (especially when someone is looking). We try to keep busy and perhaps are even quite successful in our work. When difficulties do occur in our lives, we somehow manage to “pick ourselves up by our own bootstraps”. . . Until maybe one day, we discover those boots are all worn out, or perhaps, we really didn’t own any boots to begin with. Aaahh, how our imagination and desire for the avoidance of pain can sometimes be so intertwined. Only thing is, the PAIN isn't the problem – it's just the symptom. The real problem is the UNHEALED HURTS
that are causing the pain.
I recall a life-long friend once saying to me, “I just don’t know how you do it? It’s like you keep getting into these ‘head-on car crashes’ and then you walk away like nothing happened.” Unfortunately, I thought my friend was paying me a compliment. You know, something about how STRONG I was. But, it wasn’t a compliment. After nearly twenty years went by, and more multiple emotional and heartfelt “car crashes,” I was finally at my end and in need of some rather serious repair (surgery).
One day, his words finally hit home. It felt like my life had simply become overwhelming – and I just couldn't find "my boots." Being aware of my distress, my friend called to check in on me. I told him, “I’m done. I just can’t do this anymore.” I felt the compassion in his words as he said, “You know, every time I’ve seen you over the past ten years, it’s like you're standing outside the Emergency Room doors at a hospital and you’re ‘bleeding all over the place’. And you WON’T let ANYONE help you.” My response came from deep within my (broken) heart. I said, “Brother,
I NEED TO GET WELL.” And by Grace, my Healing Journey began. . .
As so often is the case, many people have "blind spots" when it comes to recognizing and acknowledging that THEY have personal issues (unhealed hurts) that need to be addressed. And unfortunately, many of our own personal issues wind up affecting our most personal and intimate relationships, as well. At least that's been my own experience.
Sure, our relationships (especially our most intimate ones) aren't going well, or are even failing – and we're willing to admit that. But far too often, we have a habit of self-denial in which we tend to "point the finger" at someone else, while resolving that the problems in our relationship
are really the other person's fault – because of THEIR issues. . .
and certainly are NOT because of my own. In quoting Ken Unger, author and psychotherapist, “Most people are in denial when it comes to
their OWN need for personal healing.” And truly, it's often all too sad.
I NEED TO GET WELL.” And by Grace, my Healing Journey began. . .
As so often is the case, many people have "blind spots" when it comes to recognizing and acknowledging that THEY have personal issues (unhealed hurts) that need to be addressed. And unfortunately, many of our own personal issues wind up affecting our most personal and intimate relationships, as well. At least that's been my own experience.
Sure, our relationships (especially our most intimate ones) aren't going well, or are even failing – and we're willing to admit that. But far too often, we have a habit of self-denial in which we tend to "point the finger" at someone else, while resolving that the problems in our relationship
are really the other person's fault – because of THEIR issues. . .
and certainly are NOT because of my own. In quoting Ken Unger, author and psychotherapist, “Most people are in denial when it comes to
their OWN need for personal healing.” And truly, it's often all too sad.
The following article confirms my own (and many peoples) need, and experiences, for personal healing. Although God will use people to lead
us to His Healing, it’s ultimately Christ alone who Heals us from our hurts, be they past or present. In the Old Testament, God gave “a Name” to His people for this particular role that He desired to play in their lives. That Name is “YeRapha – The Lord who Heals.” My hope is that you too, come to know “The Christ who came to Heal the brokenhearted.”
The transformation of our minds, hearts and relationships awaits. . .
For Life by His Grace and Healing,
R Butch David
Healing Past Hurts
Offered to the body of Jesus Christ, 2003-2010
by David W. Eckman at lordslaw.com
by David W. Eckman at lordslaw.com
Basic Concepts
What kind of hurts are we talking about?
Healing past hurts or emotional wounds has been referred to by a number of names: "inner healing", "healing of memories" and "soul healing". Regardless of what you call it, this lesson addresses those hurts, those emotional wounds, that result from events in our lives such as rejection, abandonment, abuse, neglect, violence, insecurity, being embarrassed, shamed, terrorized, scared, manipulated or otherwise controlled. Our concern is with hurts and wounds that remain long after the events that caused them, hurts that have not healed and therefore disrupt people's lives. Calling such hurts "scars" is inappropriate: A scar indicates healing of a wound, and the tissue of a scar is typically stronger than the tissue around it. Unhealed hurts are open wounds that continue to fester and flare up, causing emotional pain and suffering, sometimes physical discomfort and illness, sometimes even serious disruption.
Healing past hurts or emotional wounds has been referred to by a number of names: "inner healing", "healing of memories" and "soul healing". Regardless of what you call it, this lesson addresses those hurts, those emotional wounds, that result from events in our lives such as rejection, abandonment, abuse, neglect, violence, insecurity, being embarrassed, shamed, terrorized, scared, manipulated or otherwise controlled. Our concern is with hurts and wounds that remain long after the events that caused them, hurts that have not healed and therefore disrupt people's lives. Calling such hurts "scars" is inappropriate: A scar indicates healing of a wound, and the tissue of a scar is typically stronger than the tissue around it. Unhealed hurts are open wounds that continue to fester and flare up, causing emotional pain and suffering, sometimes physical discomfort and illness, sometimes even serious disruption.
When dealing with such hurts, it helps greatly to recognize that a spiritual background attends and in fact permeates them. With that recognition,
we can both receive and minister healing much more effectively. For one thing, such hurts almost invariably arise from the work of the enemy, the spirit or spirits that oppose YHWY (God, I Am) and the wholeness God intends for all of us to enjoy. Therefore, healing past hurts or emotional wounds typically requires dealing with what the enemy has done. Luke 13:11-16 tells of a woman who had been bent double by "a spirit" until Jesus freed her from her bondage. Jesus attributes her bondage to Satan. The account does not indicate that she suffered a physical injury or illness that Jesus healed or from which he made her well or whole. He freed her from bondage. And the bondage had spiritual roots. Although we are not told that the spirit's affliction attended a past hurt, that record illustrates some of what healing past hurts is about. And the experience of many Christians who serve Jesus by helping others receive such healing confirms the Healing's power and demonstrates that God, who created
us, is also our Healer. Although He has made us self-healing, He stands ready to help that process when we need it.
When I see phrases like "let go of", "move on from" or "get over" the
past or hear people talk about having trouble letting go of their past, moving on in their lives or getting over something that's happened to them, I recognize a need for healing of past hurts. People cannot "let go" of their past, nor should they try. They might be able to "move on", but the pain of the past remains. And telling people to "get over it" only adds more pain. The pain of past hurts creates a form of bondage. What these folks really need is freedom from the hurts, the psychological wounds, the painful memories, the "broken heart", the emotional baggage that interferes with enjoying their lives. The events that produced those hurts and memories may constitute a very small part of people's past, but the hurts and memories have an inordinate impact on their present. When Jesus heals those past hurts, he transforms the memories, removing the pain. He also enables the person to begin remembering and enjoying the more pleasant memories of the past. I can testify to this from my own experience and the experience of others with whom my wife and I have prayed. Instead of letting go of the past, therefore, I encourage everyone suffering from past hurts to reclaim the past by getting those hurts healed.
past or hear people talk about having trouble letting go of their past, moving on in their lives or getting over something that's happened to them, I recognize a need for healing of past hurts. People cannot "let go" of their past, nor should they try. They might be able to "move on", but the pain of the past remains. And telling people to "get over it" only adds more pain. The pain of past hurts creates a form of bondage. What these folks really need is freedom from the hurts, the psychological wounds, the painful memories, the "broken heart", the emotional baggage that interferes with enjoying their lives. The events that produced those hurts and memories may constitute a very small part of people's past, but the hurts and memories have an inordinate impact on their present. When Jesus heals those past hurts, he transforms the memories, removing the pain. He also enables the person to begin remembering and enjoying the more pleasant memories of the past. I can testify to this from my own experience and the experience of others with whom my wife and I have prayed. Instead of letting go of the past, therefore, I encourage everyone suffering from past hurts to reclaim the past by getting those hurts healed.
Where do the hurts reside?
The past hurts addressed in this lesson reside in our memory and affect the way we think, the choices or decisions we make, the emotions we feel, and inner and outward reactions to other people and what they say, as well as both pleasant and painful events. The people who recorded the Bible referred to the place where such activity occurs with a number of words and phrases, some of which we translate as "heart", "soul", "mind", "spirit", "innermost being" and "inward parts". Today, many, if not most,
of us who minister in this type of healing refer to that place simply as the soul (psyche in Greek), which generally encompasses what we might call personality or individuality: thoughts, will, memories, and emotions. Even when the hurts have been thoroughly suppressed and no longer infect the conscious memory, they can remain open wounds and affect the quality of our lives.
of us who minister in this type of healing refer to that place simply as the soul (psyche in Greek), which generally encompasses what we might call personality or individuality: thoughts, will, memories, and emotions. Even when the hurts have been thoroughly suppressed and no longer infect the conscious memory, they can remain open wounds and affect the quality of our lives.
Why bother with past hurts?
If allowed to remain unhealed, such hurts can lead to many types of problems, some quite serious. For example, psychologists inform us that depression often results from anger that has not been released or resolved. The anger arises from a particular hurt, which for various reasons, the person feeling it is not able or allowed to express constructively but stuffs down inside. In some people that depression can lead to suicide or acts that harm other persons, including close family members. Other people experience what medicine calls psychosomatic illnesses, actual physical illnesses that have psychological roots. Sometimes people with such unhealed hurts may exhibit various forms
of rage or an inability to relate to others in a healthy way. Some with such hurts inflict on others the same acts that produced the hurts in them, particularly in abuse case.
of rage or an inability to relate to others in a healthy way. Some with such hurts inflict on others the same acts that produced the hurts in them, particularly in abuse case.
From personal experience and that of others, I would say that everyone has past hurts that want healing, some much less serious than others. Everyone can benefit from healing those hurts. To use one woman's imagery, as we grow up from childhood and suffer various hurts that are not resolved or healed, we are like houses in which the garbage (the unresolved, unhealed hurt) is thrown into the basement and after a few years, the entire house begins to stink. To borrow from Jesus' image of a person delivered from the spirit which then wanders in waterless places only to return with seven buddies to make the person's condition worse than it was originally (Matt. 12:43-45, Luke 11:24-26), we are like houses that have broken windows and doors and have begun to decay from abuse and neglect, and the spirits that cause us to miss God's mark for us are like bums who move in and out of the house, trashing it at will but not always present.
Healing past hurts helps, for example, when a person feels particularly insecure, becomes addicted, is easily angered or hurt, frequently feels resentful, bitter or depressed, finds it difficult to hold or enjoy a job, or cannot maintain healthy relationships with others. A person should
seek to heal past hurts when suffering anxiety attacks or autoimmune conditions or diseases. Some of us have found that even a small measure of such healing helps when a person suffers from certain forms of arthritis or from cancer. Whenever a physical problem arises that does not have
a clearly discernable physical cause (and maybe even when it does), it would be appropriate to seek healing of past hurts.
seek to heal past hurts when suffering anxiety attacks or autoimmune conditions or diseases. Some of us have found that even a small measure of such healing helps when a person suffers from certain forms of arthritis or from cancer. Whenever a physical problem arises that does not have
a clearly discernable physical cause (and maybe even when it does), it would be appropriate to seek healing of past hurts.
From observing and knowing several people diagnosed with mental illness, I have begun to believe that such illnesses are spiritually related. But not all mental or emotional problems are: some may be caused by injury or physical problems. A spiritually related problem may begin in prior generations, making it a generational problem, or it may develop from things an individual has done. Most past hurts, however, seem to be wounds (not scars) from childhood, perhaps some trauma, some event incorrectly perceived, some unfilled emotional or physical need, or some other cause. Whatever caused them, past hurts typically seem to stunt
an individual's maturity and growth and sometimes even reverse it.
an individual's maturity and growth and sometimes even reverse it.
How do we know when healing happens?
A healthy soul is one that is mature, whole, and unblemished in God’s eyes. In a healthy soul, we see an ability to love unconditionally, understand deeply and act and react appropriately and consistently with God's word. Healing past hurts or emotional wounds helps a person toward that maturity.
Regular study of the Bible over many years has taught me that God wants us to progress from being totally self-centered, our condition in infancy, to being God- and other-centered, from primary concern for what we want
or need to concern for what God wants and others need, becoming true instruments of Christ's peace in a troubled and selfish world. That is true maturity, true holiness, real manhood and real womanhood. For too many people, religious rituals and practices focus on "self" – how to manipulate a higher power to produce a benefit for the supplicant. True Christianity, on the other hand, expects us to leave self behind, while remaining in control of what we do – a remarkable feat that is totally beyond all human ability. That, I believe, is why God gave us the gift of
the Holy Spirit.
or need to concern for what God wants and others need, becoming true instruments of Christ's peace in a troubled and selfish world. That is true maturity, true holiness, real manhood and real womanhood. For too many people, religious rituals and practices focus on "self" – how to manipulate a higher power to produce a benefit for the supplicant. True Christianity, on the other hand, expects us to leave self behind, while remaining in control of what we do – a remarkable feat that is totally beyond all human ability. That, I believe, is why God gave us the gift of
the Holy Spirit.
Now, lest anyone misunderstand, being God- and other-centered does not mean neglecting our own needs. On the contrary, it requires meeting our needs so that we can serve God and others without our needs interfering. In other words, our primary concern should not be ourselves, but we should take care of ourselves. In addition, we must recognize that desires are not needs. To confuse them is a sign that we need greater maturity.
How do we get the healing?
If you'd like to try this by yourself, you can ask Christ to heal you from something that's been bothering you. But finish studying this entire lesson first. Knowing what happens during such sessions helps if you seek your own healing. For example, when God revealed that I suffered from insecurity that had contributed greatly to outbursts of anger, I asked Christ to take me to the memory that He would heal to remove it. One by one, He reminded me of three incidents that happened when I was 6 years old. Because of the shame their memory carried, I had never told anyone about them. As I recalled each of them in sequence, seeing them in my mind's eye, He appeared in them with me. In the most shameful one, He sat with me, not saying a word, not even putting His arm around me, just accepting me as I was. I did not associate the memories with my insecurity, and at the time, I was not aware of any change. But about a year later, I realized that I was no longer worrying as much as I had and that I no longer got angry as often or as easily as I had. Still later, I realized that He had transformed the memories, so that now when I recall them, He is a part of them, and I feel no shame. In fact, I am now able to tell about them freely.
When I went to God for that healing, I already had some experience praying with folks for healing of their past hurts and had done quite a lot
of reading about the subject, so I knew that Christ often heals a past hurt by appearing in the memory of it. In fact, that seems to be
the most common method of healing, but for folks who have trouble visualizing, especially if the memory involves a lot of pain, He uses other methods. In fact, if the variety encountered by my wife and me in praying with others is any indication, He has an infinite variety of ways He helps people receive healing from past hurts.
If you seek healing of a past hurt on your own, read through the following instructions for prayer ministers to familiarize yourself with the process and the scriptures I've provided. Your goal is to receive whatever God chooses to give you. So find a place without distractions and relax. Take a few deep breaths to help you relax. Then you might want to read the verses in Psalm 103 that I have highlighted or some other scripture that will put you in a receiving mode. Try to relax your mind if you find it dwelling on anything. Then simply ask Jesus to heal. You might ask Him, as I did, to heal whatever memory is causing a problem. Don't be concerned if He takes you to a memory that does not seem very significant. When I went to Christ for my healing, He chose memories
that I had already prayed for Him to heal. I expected Him to take me to a memory of one of my most traumatic childhood experiences, one that I knew caused a lot of insecurity. He didn't do it then, and even when I've gone back for further healing, He never has. Take whatever He gives you and let Him process it and redeem you from it.
If you try to receive the healing yourself and do not think it's happening, you may find it helpful to seek out a prayer minister who has experience with healing of past hurts. You may even have the good fortune to find
one who has a gift for such healing. But regardless of whom you select, remember that Christ does the healing when He wants, the way He wants and at the speed He wants, so don't start with expectations of instant healing.
one who has a gift for such healing. But regardless of whom you select, remember that Christ does the healing when He wants, the way He wants and at the speed He wants, so don't start with expectations of instant healing.
*To view the entire article along with “Instructions for Prayer Ministers” please visit the website: www.lordslaw.com/soulheal.htm
