Sinners Make Better Lovers

Sharing an Article by Ken Unger*

Some churches make it seem as if the goal of Christianity is to make
us holy. My problem is, the harder I tried the worse I became. Then I remembered why I liked Jesus in the first place. He is the sinner’s
best Friend.

Jesus hung out with some tawdry characters – people who ate and drank too much, shady businessmen and even women of questionable repute. He seemed more comfortable with sinners than “saints.” When a religious leader invited him to dinner, a woman (The Message Bible calls her the "town harlot") knelt at his feet, kissing and washing them with her tears. Behind his back, the religious leaders wondered why he didn’t know what kind of woman she was.

Jesus knew what they were thinking and asked his host a poignant question. “Who would be more grateful,” he asked, “someone who was forgiven a huge debt or a small one?” His host said he guessed the person who was forgiven a large one would be more appreciative. Jesus then pointed out that his host had done nothing to refresh him, while this woman had not ceased to do all she could to make him comfortable and to show her gratitude. He then said, “Those who are forgiven much, love much.” The religious people didn’t get it, grumbling amongst themselves at the audacity of one who felt he could forgive sins.

I recently spoke with a Christian single mom about helping her kids make good decisions. It’s a real challenge. Often, we well-meaning Christians ride our kids so hard they feel they must mess up their lives just to break free. I shared with her a scripture I love – one I never heard a sermon on: “Be not overly righteous, nor be overly wise. Why should you destroy yourself?” (Ecclesiastes 7:16)

Shocking, isn’t it? How can being too righteous destroy us? When she asked me that, I reminded her of a great Christian leader whose dynamic seminars packed out auditoriums for years, but the weight of unrealistic expectations caught up to him. His brother fell into adultery, rumors surfaced of financial irregularities, and the ministry was discredited. Perfectionism is a killer. We can try so hard to be good that we put ourselves under “the law of sin and death.” We get trapped in religious bondage, creating a downward spiral that leads us into deeper depravity.

You see, God’s goal isn’t to make us perfect in the way that we commonly think. When the Bible calls us to be perfect, the word for ‘perfect’ means whole and complete. The goal of the law is to be perfect as our heavenly Father is perfect – perfect in our Love for sinners and saints alike.
We can easily miss the true goal of the law and settle for petty behavior modification. Eternal life is more than that. It prepares us for eternity. Heaven wouldn’t be heavenly if it were packed with groups of gossiping religious prudes.

Sin hurts us, and that’s why God wants to free us from it. But Love is the prevailing lifestyle of God’s Kingdom. John Wesley, who had the strictest doctrine on perfection of any theologian rightly taught that biblical perfection is perfect love. All God’s laws point to Love because God is Love and He created us to be like Him.

A dear friend once taught me a sweet little camp song: “Heaven is, a
wonderful place, filled with, glory and grace, I wanna see my Savior’s
face, heaven is a wonderful place, I wanna be there.” What makes
heaven wonderful? Love! Not only God’s love, but incredible love from everyone else as well. That’s why Jesus’ vignette about the town harlot makes so much sense. That’s why His reputation as a wine bibber and friend of sinners draws me. I don’t know about you but I have sinned
much. I have a great debt that is forgiven daily. I need grace, again
and again, and I need to somehow reconnect with God’s Love every day of my life.

Sadly, such a message is more often heard in new age churches and cults than in Christ’s Church. Churchianity majors in minors and minors in majors. If we could change that, the world would beat a path
to our door.

I once envisioned a church where love reigned supreme, every Christian ministered, and retreats and small groups were committed to love, spiritual growth and nurture. I soon realized I was not called to pastor such a church, but to write and lead retreats and seminars that helped churches do that. I eventually gave up on ever finding a church like that. . . perhaps the most successful churches will show that the goal of the church
is to equip people to love sinners and one another [unconditionally and without judgment – rbd].

A favorite seminary professor used to say, “The world has a right
to look at the church and see Love. Where they don’t, they can conclude that the church doesn’t exist.”

Love is God’s goal for us. It’s far more difficult and immeasurably more blessed than lining up doctrinal ducks and getting everyone to appear squeaky clean.  It’s what brings God’s Kingdom to earth. And when that happens, you can’t keep people away. That’s why Jesus is the friend of sinners. And boy, am I ever glad he is! We sinners really do make better lovers.

*  Ken R. Unger is known as America's Soul Doctor. His new book,
The Ultimate Breakthrough – Spiritual Therapy for Emotional Pain actually heals emotional pain. You can purchase the book online by clicking on this link: http://transformationincorporated.com/
 
You can learn more about the book and Ken by clicking on this link:
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyGa79NOwBY

Taming Your Tongue. . .

It’s Not Just About (!%#& !#%) “Swearing” 

Sharing an Article by David Wilkerson

I remember a scene from The Three Stooges movie-short called Disorder in The Court. Curly was having a rather difficult time being sworn in as a witness. In seeing his incompetence, the Judge spoke up and said, “He's asking you, do you swear. . . ?” Curly responded, “NO – but I know all the words. . . nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.” With that in mind, much of what I’m about to share, regarding our language and words, is surely debatable. 

I admit there are times in which I tend to use some “colorful” language and perhaps “unholy” words. Maybe I just broke my chainsaw, or the roof I just fixed is leaking – again. Or maybe, it was when I was experiencing some extreme heartfelt pain over a tongue-lashing and judgment I didn’t deserve. Then again, there are other times when I’m just trying to be funny. And perhaps, humor is in the ear (and heart) of the beholder, as well. 

Now truly, I’m not trying to condone the use of foul language. And being that I agree with everything the Bible says, whether I like it or not, I do understand just a little bit about “harsh words.” But what if we never use any words that are of a questionable (foul) nature and yet still have harsh thoughts, and are unloving with our words, regarding others? Is it possible that God searches “the heart of a man or woman” regardless of the “proper words” we use? 

I recall sitting in a pastor’s private study some twenty years ago. I had
just gone through a rather bitter divorce. Unfortunately, as some of us
have also experienced, my two young children were being used as “ammunition” against me. I was repeatedly denied visitation for nearly
two years. And truly, it was KILLING me. I loved my children and I also wanted, very badly, to be their dad. Eventually, through the court system, things worked out and I was able to see my kids on a regular, loving and unhindered basis. 

As I sat across from the pastor, I shared my extreme frustration (and anger) over the situation. Truly, I was looking for some answers. Maybe,
I was also looking for some empathy. Unfortunately, he admitted that he really didn’t have any answers for me. He also admitted that he’d never gone through what I was experiencing. Still, I did appreciate his taking the time to listen and I'll always remember his kindness. 

As I was trying to share my feelings, I recall saying at one point, “And,
I could really give a rat’s. . . dupa!” (pronounced “doo-pah” – Yes, I’m Polish). Wow! – I almost “slipped” right in front of a pastor. What I wanted to say was “rat’s ASS!” Oops – Sorry, there I go! 

In my mind, I knew something about “Taming Your Tongue,” but perhaps it was my broken heart that needed to be healed – before my tongue could be tamed. I received a look from the pastor that felt like disapproval, due to my choice of words. But I wonder, did he really care about the condition of my heart, while expressing my heartache, frustration and pain, or just the condition of my mouth? After that, I tried my best to keep all my words “holy and proper.” I was also learning how
to “bury” my true feelings, so that I could “look good” on the “outside.” 

Oh well, I guess maybe that “rat's dupa” thing will possibly come up at
the “Judgment Seat” when I go before Christ. And then again. . . maybe not? I do find it interesting that Jesus never called Peter to account for Peter’s “cursing” in denying Christ the third time, after He was arrested. Perhaps Jesus knew how “scared to death” Peter was – deep in his heart. His Leader was about to be killed and his dreams were surely shattered. Later, after His Resurrection, Jesus only made it a point to ask Peter,
“Do you LOVE me?” Maybe Jesus knew Peter’s heart? 

To paraphrase author Larry Crabb from his book Shattered Dreams, "Often, people in the church are more concerned with the language that people use, rather than the reality of the heartfelt feelings (and pain) which are being expressed. . . and that is most unfortunate." 

These days, I’m pretty-well recovered from my previous self-righteous and holy attitude, even regarding words. And, I really don’t care so much when someone swears or uses “colorful” language. Sometimes it seems to be seriously appropriate and other times it’s just plain damn funny. Oops – Sorry, there I go again! You see, I’m not so sure that many of us would choose to judge any soldiers, like in the movie Saving Private Ryan (with Tom Hanks), for their harsh language, given the extreme and destructive nature of war itself. Nor, could I imagine the movie My Cousin Vinny (with Joe Pesci) having the hilarious impact it does without the dialogue and language. Maybe the realities of life – like pain, fear and even humor are also heart-matters? 

Sure, maybe just like me, some of us could “tone it down” just a little – especially when children (or holy people) are around. But then again, God knows my heart. Truly, my own occasional use of colorful language is NEVER directed at another living soul (person), nor is it used in judgment or condemnation of anyone. Besides, I also think that Don Rickles is really funny. And, I’ve heard testimonies that behind the man known as “Mr. Warmth” with his colorful language, cutting remarks and jester-like humor. . . is a caring, loving, family man with a “Heart of Gold” toward everyone he meets, especially to those who know him personally.

Perhaps, we shouldn’t “judge a book by its cover.” Maybe we need to read into it, just a little, to find the heart of the matter or to understand the heart of the person whom we’re about to judge. Following, is an article about our language in regards to others. 

R Butch David

Tame Your Tongue

(By David Wilkerson*)

“But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.” (James 3:8)

In this verse from his epistle, James is talking about the tongue of a believer. He is issuing a call to the church to gain control of their tongues – before they are destroyed by them! You may ask: How serious is this matter of taming the tongue? Can an “unruly tongue” really be that sinful?

A loose tongue renders our religion absolutely worthless! It can make your every spiritual activity totally useless in God’s eyes: “If anyone among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless.” (James 1:26)

James’ reference here to those “among you” means people in the church. Not drug addicts or street people but those members of the body of Christ who appear pious, spiritual. They are active in the work of the Lord, but their tongues are unbridled, out of control! James is zeroing in on those who seem to be holy, kind, gentle and loving, yet who move about the church or their job or their family with acid tongues, always telling tidbits of gossip or listening with a willing ear. They murmur and complain and God says their religion – all their show of spirituality – is in vain, worthless!

Beloved, I do not want to stand before the judgment seat of Christ and discover that all my work for the Lord – my entire spiritual endeavor – has been in vain! I do not want to hear Him say, “David, you did mighty works in My name. You fed the hungry, clothed the naked, cast out devils, and established drug rehabilitation centers and homes for alcoholics. Yes, you preached to countless thousands and won many to the kingdom. But it was all for nothing! Many uplifting words came out of your mouth, but there were also bitter, unkind, hateful, envious words! You took My warnings on this matter of the tongue too lightly!”

You may speculate, “Surely God isn’t so unloving that He would discount my spirituality because I said something uncharitable! [unloving – rbd]”
I am speaking here of Christians whose tongues have never been tamed, who speak against God’s people without blinking an eye! Here is what God’s Word says: “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become as sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.” (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)

*David Wilkerson Ministries can be found at
 www.worldchallenge.org